TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
Randomize
