fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
Your cock deserves a montage
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
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