Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
Randomize
