wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
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