GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
Today has been the most awkward masturbatory day of my life. Possibly even more awkward than when my mom found my vibrator on Mother's Day.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize
