There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Randomize
