oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
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