I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
my brother wants to know why there are wet balloons in his bed and i think you forgot to throw the condoms away but im too hungover to check if thats what hes talking about
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize
