he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
Randomize
