no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
Randomize
