I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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