It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
Randomize
