it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
I think weed is turning my hair brown
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Randomize
