yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
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