i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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