so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
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