i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
Randomize
