Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
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