yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
Randomize
