I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Randomize
