He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
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