Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
You need to be on (or possibly create) the international emoji committee to address all of these glaring oversights
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
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