check it out our google latitudes are spooning
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
Randomize
