You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
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