Hey sorry for feelin' up your date. Sadly, this is a mass txt.
Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
This is why you don't make out with cougars at a bar... I got a linkedin request from her, wtf?
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
Randomize
