Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
Maybe they'll dismiss me from jury duty after they smell beer on me. You can't keep me in a cage and then give me an hour and a half long lunch break next to a beer fest and expect sobriety.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
Randomize
