Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
Randomize