I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
Randomize
