I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
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