Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
This baby is an asshole
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
Randomize
