The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
My most recent midlife crisis involved eating a doughnut in 30 seconds but taking 5 minutes to do half a shot of whiskey, then deciding I wasn't going to finish it.
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
Randomize
