If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
Randomize
