If that was your dad, he is hot
I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
i just had sex bonerless
He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
Randomize
