We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
This is an alert from the drunk police: you have reached the point of no return. Text messages past this point are illegible.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
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