Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
I'm pants shitting drunk right now
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Randomize
