Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Randomize
