do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
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