Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
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