Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Randomize
