He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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