I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize
