If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
Randomize