She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
Randomize
