just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
