after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
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