theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
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