i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
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