Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
I still have a little drunk in my system
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
Randomize
