party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Randomize
