Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
Randomize
