I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
Randomize
