Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
Randomize
